Will it rise or not!

Short on groceries Trying to figure out what I could make and not have to go to the store.  I'm the queen of pantry meals.  Always trying to make something from nothing.  I knew I had everything I needed to make for pizza at any given time. I am not one to pick up the phone and order pizza. I would rather make it my self. 

Yeast- I knew i had some in my spice cabinet. I pull it out got my flour, some sugar and warm water. I go to cut the package and i see the date. OH NO!  Sep 2010.  I thought- I will proof it see if it wakes up.  VOILA! It started to rise. YAY!  so- I tried to keep my eye on the bowl hoping it wouldn't get out of control. It came very close.

These are a few of my favorite things.  (I usually never buy for the name of a cook) I just happened to grab the "EVOO".  Gia Russia pizza sauce is by far my favorite from  any store bought sauce you could get.  Then its just diced onion and motz cheese, deli pepperoni .

I lightly baked the crust then added my toppings. To assure those thick areas of the crust got done.

Bon Appetit!

My green beans dish!

A few weeks ago I submitted a recipe on a whim.  It was for a cook book released by Mount Nittany Medical Center. I have honestly become obsesed with fine dinning plates, food appeal, simple, clean foods.  So I decided I was going to work on recreating the "green bean casserole " .  That dish that is served at the holidays that looks like slop.  Why take some beautiful green beans and make them look like that. 

So-  There I sat picturing it in my head.  I started just jotting down ingredients I would use.  Picturing in my head if i was in the kitchen cooking this how would I make it.  It just started to pour from me.  The items to use were easy.  I wanted it to be like the traditional.  I wanted fresh ingredients. So I did my best at tossing measurements on to paper. Picturing this dish coming together.  Put the steps together, and hit submit.  Didn't honestly think any more of it.  I have done this before. I have submitted recipes. Only to get an instant response saying "Thank you for your submission. We will review what you have given us."  Very generic. 

Then when it came for my Turkey dinner at my sisters house where i do most of the cooking, I thought this is it. I will make it NOW.!  So that is what I did.  I thought it was wonderful.  Looked amazing. I never took a picture or anything. I was very proud of it though. 

More than one week passes from the date that I made the dish. I was at work and I clocked out to go home checking my phone i seen i had a voice mail. I check it..-  It was a representative from the contest telling me "We have chosen to use your recipe, please call us to discuss details and your prize"  I was floored! I know its honestly not as big of an ordeal as what i felt.  It still means something to me.  The dish will be in the cook book and I will be getting dinner at the restaurant I wanted!  It is hard for me to do anything involving a recipe. I am cook by feel, flavor and what I have. 

You will have to just enjoy my picture or buy the cook book when it is released :)

One step in the right direction

Today I had the pleasure of meeting with the Executive chef of a very nice restaurant.  I walked in to this place and as I grabbed a hold of the door nob i took a deep breath!< in- out> I walked in to a very quiet place ... and that was great.. ... Dinning room set for dinner, I quietly just turned around and let everything sink in. Absorbing things slowly...    

I spent the next 2 hours having the pleasure of walking around this kitchen been showed everything menu, recipes, storage.  I keep running everything back threw my head trying to remember the things that were told to me.  I am spilling with excitement.  This is what I want! This is where I belong. I see my future here.  If they only knew how hard it was to hold my emotions back and keep from practically crying.  Faith in my self is the biggest thing right now !~ I need to learn to trust in my self. I need to go with the flow. 

My family are going to need to understand and be there to support me in my adventure down the path that i have been waiting for my entire adult life.  I can't wait to actually share images of "things to come" .  Please keep me in your thoughts over the next few weeks, days, hours.... I need all the faith in the world to get me where i need to be. 

Plates full of dreams are honestly where my dreams are !

My love of Cooking

I have not had the time that I would like for the one thing that gives me great pleasure.  Cooking! 
I have been making some very simple meals.  I keep drawing a blank unable to come up with something creative. I have spent many hours looking at pictures of food "art" on tastespotting.com  I love it!  I have so many things I want to create from looking at that site.  One thing I would love to try to make is Sushi. The lack of fresh sea food here would be my biggest preventive.  I could make veggie rolls, and CA rolls..

Anyway- I have realized that the more I think of the things that I want so badly have me becoming depressed, forming hatred  for my job.  Wishing I could figure out the direction I wish my desire for cooking would take me.  I fear the working in a restaurant because the times that they are the busiest is the time I love being with my family. In the evenings and on the weekends.  Personal chef in this area would never last.  I have thought about creating a banquet hall/catering.  That doesn't allow for ME to shine... It is so much easier on a smaller scale to create works of art on a plate.....

For now I will just tough it out... Perhaps one day my eyes will open and I will see the direction I'm to go.  Till then I will be miserable dreaming about that possible chance I might one day get to create a "plate full of dreams".  .....

Love your family

I have found sometimes we get to caught up in our own lives. We find that we "don't have time" for others. We rush our lives away!
I honestly have a major problem with this.  I stopped at my mom's the other day to get my dog after work and my niece and nephew were at my moms. My nephew is getting so big!.  I haven't seen them in a while and that is my fault. It is hard when you are working and have your own children to enjoy your extended family. Everyone has busy lives. It has had me thinking recently. Of my family growing up.  I always enjoyed spending time with my aunts, cousins, and extended family.  It makes me so sad to see how a family once so strong and happy has now grown apart. -  I still love my extended family. I miss them. I just know that our relationships will never come back to what we had some 10 years ago or even longer...Wow, might seem corny but a "Boys 2 men" song came to mind- The name of the song is "Water run dry" - Many words in this song couldn't be more true! "We don't even talk anymore."  - "Don't even say I love you no more"  "Now they can see the tears in our eyes- But we deny the pain in our hearts"... Just listen to the song- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yNRHnwCFQ4Q

Thinking of that it has made me realize my relationship with my own family.  I love my husband and children very much.  I think I have seemed distant in many ways as of recent. Showing a lack of patients, affection, and expressing my love for my husband. No matter what my excuse is I vow to changes! My children are my world! I love them very much. It is scary how hard reality hits showing how fast they grow up.  I wish it would just slow down a little. My oldest will be 14 in just a few weeks!!!!!!!!! He is play football as i struggle to let go and just watch him grow all of the fears in side of me just want to pull him back and shelter him.  My little one being the dare devil he is always hurting himself. Making requests for more things to hurt himself on! It just never seems to end. 

I just want my family to know that I love them. I wish I could spend more time with them. Hold your family close to you. Express your love constantly!  HUG! .... - Ok I promise to cook something and add another dreamy plate of food!

The world of Chili

Have you ever looked for a recipe for chili and get over whelmed by the number of different things used in each different recipe.  From the different spices, beans or no beans, the animal (meat) and the cut.  I honestly set out to "wow" everyone with my chili.  I had to travel this morning for my son's eye dr appointment. This town had so many wonderful stores. I figured i would just stop at one of them on my way home.


Pull in to a store not to get grocery items but to grab a few "back to school" items.  We found what we wanted made our way to the check out. i reach for my wallet in my pocket open it and instantly realized i left my atm card at home. :( Apologized to the check out girl left the items got in the car apologized to my child. Made a few emergency phone calls trying to get some of the ingredients to make chili just so i knew we would be able to eat before my oldest had to go to football. 

I think no matter how much time i let my self i always feel i need to rush and i don't like rushing. Hoping my mom had a few cans of diced tomatoes that she would have sent with my husband when i walked in my door i realized she didn't have any.

I said well i will just make special beans.  I picked some of the chili peppers we were growing in the pots on the porch and gathered my ingredients.  I started browning my farm raised ground beef (from our farm). I cut up a big red onion 4-5 peppers (all different sizes and colors.) . I just started dumping everything in the pot. What was the one last ingredient i didn't think of. Figured i would have it.  Chili powder.

Anyway- everyone sat down and one response "mmm this is pretty good" i gave a sigh of relief.  It worked out after all.  Not how i like chili but it was good and colorful.

3 Kinds of beans
some fresh diced tomatoes
corn
beef
a secret ingredient
1 onion and 4 different chili's

Rainbow flavored dinner

A week ago I had made something i was hungry for. Stuffed pork chops, Corn, baked creamy mac n cheese.  I plated it up took a picture of it and turned my nose up to it. I gave the plate a twist, still not happy!

I held it under different light. I still was very depressed looking at this meal filled with YELLOW!

I went on and on about it to my friends on Facebook.  Someone said something about a "Roy G Biv" dinner. It hit me. What an amazing idea.  I had to wait I asked around, announced what i was doing. Went to the farmers market where I know I would find every color i needed.

Not sure what day i wanted to cook this "rainbow dinner" I let everything go and decided Sunday was when it would happen.  Not sure what protein we were going to have with it. I had many ideas of something colorful something full of flavor. Tuna perhaps.  Did i want to go back to the grocery store to pick up tuna? NO!

Well Sunday came the day started to to dwindle down after we went to brunch. I was not feeling well at all! My children were invited to Grandma's to spend the night.  But we still had to eat dinner.  Not in much of a mood to be creative i just washed up the potatoes diced them a few times chopped the pepper, carrots and onion.  Tossed everything in a pain with Olive oil, salt and pepper.  Thawed out two boneless skinless chicken breasts. Wanting it to be flavorful I went and trimmed some rosemary from my plant out side. Pulled a few peddles of thyme washed them slightly tossed them with the veggies that i then added a little lazy garlic (dried minced garlic). Seasoned the chicken with all the same things tossed it in the oven... This amazing thing happened

  My plate was amazing the colors were just what i wanted. I had envisioned me actually placing things on the plate in such a way that it resembled a rainbow. But i did not! I was still not feeling well and i was to tired to put that extra step in to it. 

I sat down to my chicken with  roasted veggies, baby spinich with heirloom tomatoes with walnuts and balsamic vinegar salad.

My mouth was soooo happy! Now that i have promised my friend once i make it to assure it was safe for others to eat I would make it for her. I must make this meal all over again. Thank you Kristi for the idea of this beautiful dinner.

work or not

I'm honestly sitting here pulling for the reasons i have to go to work.
This has become just a "job". I have so many other things i would rather do with my day. I have a house that i would love to stay home and tend to. My children whom need my attention. This farm we have needs so much work.

On the days that I am suppose to go to work I can't am crying inside. Knowing that i have passions for so many other things in life. I love people but those whom i encounter are not friendly are not great-full for any help I give them.

My manager asked me last week "What is wrong?". I do not recall my response I do recall what she said in return. "Be thankful you have a job". I am thankful I had the ability to find a job when our family needed money to make ends meet. I only continue to stay here because i enjoy affording some of the finer things i use to cook with, I enjoy going to do things with my family and spending a dollar or two on my self once and a while.

This is just another chapter in my life and when small novel of "life at Lowe's " is over I will look back at the friends i have made working here. The things i have learned about people.

Till anything changes i must dress my self and march out the door paint a smile on my face and endure another day. at my "job"

to blog or not to blog

I'm not sure how to blog, or why I even want to do this.  I guess I'm looking for a way to give my friends on facebook a break from seeing my endless supply of pictures of my food i cook. Or hearing my rambling about my life.

I'm sure till I come up with what i honestly want to put in to this my blog will be very boring. For today I will just say good morning and I hope to possibly provide some entertainment for someone.